drsmax: Who wants a thing?

Dr. Smax (

drsmax) wrote,
@ 2004-07-21 11:15:00

Who wants a thing?
Do you want a thing? If so, I'll write you one. It will be exactly 100 words long (or 101 if the title is counted), one of which will be a word of your choosing as well as the title of the thing. You will post it in your LJ or link to its appearance in mine or tattoo it on your forehead or all of the above.

How to get your thing: an example.

LJ user

otterspace replies to this offer in a comment saying something along the lines of "Yo. Smax. Thing me up, bitch. Make my word be SUSURRATION." I then boot-up my neck-top computer and crank out something along the lines of the following:

---begin thing---

Susurration

by

drsmax

Sunrise lingers on a horizon glimpsed through branches as

otterspace trundles through the forest. The rhythmic susurration of kicked underbrush matches the jangle of his pocketed quarters. Pausing, he fishes out a pair. Their serrations, when rubbed together, produce the noise that lures his quarry. The swelling chattering of the approaching army marks the start of this final battle. Thumbing the power stud of his electric whip,

otterspace braces for melee. Neither human nor the onslaught of bright-eyed rodents can predict the outcome. Brains or numbers? Electro-lash or bucked-tooth? Who will be the last mammal standing when man fights squirrel?

--end thing---

Can you dig it? So, who wants a thing?

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(Post a new comment)

	madolan 2004-07-21 08:18 am UTC (link)
	Oh, I want a drsmax thing. I'm quite keen on the idea. In fact, I covet one. And that must be my word: COVET. I'm a covetous wretch, after all. For now, I rub my hands greedily. Humble damp-eyed thanks come later. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 08:20 am UTC (link)
	Okee dokee. "covet" shall be thy thing. The thing machine is churning as we speak. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	hallwayjulie 2004-07-21 08:23 am UTC (link)
	I want to be thinged. Or thung. SALACIOUS! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Thing. Thing a Thong. drsmax 2004-07-21 08:28 am UTC (link)
	Mmmm "salacious" feels good in the mouth, doesn't it? Like "lugubrious," one of my faves. Consider yourself well thung. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	givemethegun 2004-07-21 08:27 am UTC (link)
	Am I too new to the Convention to request a Thing? If not, let my Thing be the dangling-in-the-wind chiming of 'Debauchedness'. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 08:31 am UTC (link)
	"Too new"? That's crazy-talk. You shall have a thing. And that thing shall be known by the ka-chunky multisyllabic glory that is the word "debauchedness". Stay tuned. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	going2georgia 2004-07-21 08:39 am UTC (link)
	Thing me, Pete. Draconian. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 08:43 am UTC (link)
	Long time no hear, Phoebster. So far people have been telepathically discerning my favorite words. "Draconian" is no exception. My team of expert thing thingers are busy thinging you a thing right now. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	ghastlymess 2004-07-21 01:18 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, smax. Of course I'd love a thing from you. However, I know how it is to get requests piled up, so no hard feelings if you've got too many. My word would have to be HA'PENNY (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 01:24 pm UTC (link)
	It would be a pleasure to fire up the smithy and see what sorta thing comes out for the contracted lovliness that is "ha'penny." (Reply to this) (Parent)

	ferndorn 2004-07-21 01:27 pm UTC (link)
	Do we have to know you to get a thing? I found you from aisufaia's journal. Could you thing me for "obfuscation"? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 01:31 pm UTC (link)
	Knowledge is not required, nor is friendship. Consider yourself thinged for "obfuscation". (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	My word: a_lad_inane 2004-07-21 02:37 pm UTC (link)
	"Brouhaha." (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: My word: drsmax 2004-07-21 02:38 pm UTC (link)
	And "brouhaha" it shall be. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 02:46 pm UTC (link)
	Hi, there. I would be quite glad to whip up thing for "leisure." Just curious: Do you know anyone who pronounces it so that it rhymes with "pleasure"? I do. And those peeps are whack. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	novadrome 2004-07-21 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	I fancy a THING. My word is a breezy "LEISURE". (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Gimme Two Words for SPASMS, and I'll Give You a Word for Your Thing spasmsproject 2004-07-21 04:00 pm UTC (link)
	Hey, Smax! Gimme two words for my Two-Word Project from SPASMS, and I'll give you a word for a Thing. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: Gimme Two Words for SPASMS, and I'll Give You a Word for Your Thing drsmax 2004-07-21 04:05 pm UTC (link)
	Fair enough, since I pretty much got the basic idea from you in the first place. Where do I post my two words? (Reply to this) (Parent)

	billyphuz 2004-07-21 05:23 pm UTC (link)
	if i'm not too late, i would like consideration for thingage. the word is 'tawdry.' (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 07:51 pm UTC (link)
	Too late? Not at all. Your thing shall be quite "tawdry" if I may say so myself. And I may. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Am I too late for Thing? snizzpod 2004-07-21 06:23 pm UTC (link)
	Me! I so much want A Thing. Today's word is: Samurai-snorkel (it's one word!!) (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: Am I too late for Thing? drsmax 2004-07-21 07:55 pm UTC (link)
	Ahh, sweet Snizzy. I was wondering where you were. And no: it's never too late. And yes: "Samurai-snorkel" is indeed one word! I wouldn't be able to come up with my precise 100 word length things without similarly liberal hyphen-based neologizing. I can't wait to sink my teeth into "samurai-snorkel". (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Thing a Thong of Thick Pants raygunn 2004-07-21 06:48 pm UTC (link)
	Thing me, honey. Thing me all night long to the tune of POLYSTYRENE. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: Thing a Thong of Thick Pants drsmax 2004-07-21 06:54 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, I'm going to thing you. I'm going to thing you hard. And I'm going to thing you long. And your ears will be a-ringin'. From my a-thingin'. And who knows? Perhaps the "Polystyrene" will come in the form of a bath-tub-ful of sexy sexy packing-peanuts. Shhhhhh. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	withoutagod 2004-07-21 07:27 pm UTC (link)
	I want a thing, and my word(s) of choice are "unemployed actor." Also, I better be seeing you and Cherry on Saturday. 111 1st street, Jersey City, about two block from Joe's pub. It's 8 bucks and we're the shitty opening act--doors are at 5. Please drink yourselves into oblivion either before or during our performance. e-mail me if you need directions or whatever (Reply to this) (Thread)

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	drsmax 2004-07-21 07:59 pm UTC (link)
	I would be thrilled to lay a thing on you and when I squint and scrunch up my face I can see that, yes, "unemployed actor" is indeed a single word. Nothing, at least, some hyphenation won't be able to fix up. Re: the show. It's still a bit up in the air whether I'll be hangin' with the DD Saturday. But if not, we'll be there for some ear-bleeding melodies. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	meifumado 2004-07-21 08:52 pm UTC (link)
	Yo. Smax. Thing me up, bitch. Make my word be ONOMATOPOEIA. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-21 08:56 pm UTC (link)
	At last, Jordan has arrived. Your observance of the protocal is exquisite. And your word choice makes my brain go buzzzzz. One thing, coming up: A thing called "Onomatopoeia." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	alyska 2004-07-22 07:02 am UTC (link)
	may i please have an "apocalyptic" thing? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Apocalypse Soon drsmax 2004-07-22 07:06 am UTC (link)
	Oooooh! I'm always dying for an excuse to foretell the coming apocalypse. What better excuse than to thing you up with a hundred words one of which is "apocalypse"? No better excuse at all. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	willowfinn 2004-07-22 07:12 am UTC (link)
	This is a brilliant thread of things! I'm simply dying to have a thing myself. Could I have a RUSSIAN thing? Oh please oh please? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-22 07:18 am UTC (link)
	Compliments? Begging? I respond extremely well to such things. I am super-pumped to provide you with something incredibly "Russian". (Reply to this) (Parent)

	pharminatrix 2004-07-22 12:51 pm UTC (link)
	I would adore a thingie thing. Make mine "blowfish". (Reply to this) (Thread)

	drsmax 2004-07-22 12:54 pm UTC (link)
	Years ago I was singer/guitarist in a punk band called "Jefferson Blowfish" which we all thought was pretty cool until "Hootie and the Blowfish" came along and ruined the connotation for us. But the word "blowfish" and blowfish themselves are dear, if not near, to me. I'll gladly thing you up some "Blowfish." (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	LJ ate my thing! request... sadira42 2004-07-22 01:09 pm UTC (link)
	Perhaps that can be my thing? But if not, if you're so kind, can I have a "defenestration" thing? (Reply to this) (Thread)